The Academy Award-nominated Fortnite movie is our punishment for entrusting Taika Waititi and Ryan Reynolds with blank cheques to corporate franchise filmmaking.
Free Guy is a disreputable incompetence of a motion picture so transparent and inconsistent in its message, and so lazy in its presentation, it is mystifying how anyone could enjoy it for any other reason than its comedy. It is less of an insult to cinema, than a warning; a warning that if (because) audiences respond (are responding) to cynically produced non-art such as this, Hollywood will continue (is continuing) to supply that appetite.
Its disruption of jokes that lack set-up or punchline, and misunderstanding of not only video games and the internet, but computers themselves exhibits an almost boastful laziness. What is supposed to be a tame, Judd Apatow-style excessively improvised comedy crossed with hollywood action blockbuster, decides at several points along the line that it also wants to be an anti-greed satire, a philosophical thought experiment in free will, and a romantic comedy. Correspondingly, the film tackles these subgenres with an equal lack of effort. The ‘greedy CEO villain’ archetype is presented with such cartoonish simplicity, it’s laughable (and not in the way the film intends). The philosophy demonstrated on the realization that you’re artificial is so derivative and shallow (in other words, artificial itself), it might as well be non-existent. The romance is so schlocky and generic, I’m surprised Hollywood is even allowed to literally use the same ending every time they insert one into their film.
But really, who cares? None of this is exactly new for Hollywood, why should it be considered so disgusting now? Maybe the comedy did it for you and its boring presentation doesn’t bother you, and that’s great! Maybe you enjoyed the action despite it being CGI-heavy, which is awesome too! Truthfully, none of this is why I hate the film so much. No, Free Guy‘s true insidious nature comes in its blatant hypocrisy. Of its many crammed-in themes, the main one is its supposed disdain for unoriginality and IP hoarding in media, and encouragement of an increased independence in the arts industries.
In a Disney movie. A Disney movie where Ryan Reynolds pulls out a Captain America shield to defend himself, followed by the deliverance of a massive punch from a Hulk arm, followed by arming himself with a lightsaber and dueling with it, followed by the lightsaber morphing into some fucking llama axe from Fortnite, followed by a reference to Half-Life, and then one to Portal. It’s not hard to notice the contradiction, yet the film insists on treating its message without an ounce of irony.
I’m ashamed my household pays for a service that funnels money directly to the company that produces this trash. Free Guy is a distraction from everything meaningful in the world, and a distraction from Disney’s disgusting behaviour as a company. Its messages are negligibly thought out (if at all) and not unique. It’s not inventive with its concept at all. It’s an embarrassment. It’s an advertisement.
It’s so idiotic, it makes me want to cry.
